Less than an hour left...I'm spending it with my Forties.
We're reliving the great moments, along with the tearful goodbyes, the full-to-bursting moments, the gaping bottomless holes. Grief. Laughter. Deep sighs. Groping blindly. The vistas and landscapes imprinted in my heart, the growings and shrinkings, striving and letting go, the serenity and jittering upheavals. I don't even know how to write about it all, the scenes fly through my mind like flickering silent film, but through it all, I know I've been moving forward, somehow stepping into nothing, but finding solid ground, pushing through dense fog and finding sunlight, swimming upward, straining, lungs bursting, thinking I can't go any further, but suddenly breaking free and gulping the wind in the leaves, sometimes tossing back and forth, clinging to branches, scared and helpless in the storm, yet still finding the strength to hang on, to look forward, to trust. Always to trust.